Modern Lives

Tim and I made a decision over the weekend to start making changes to our lifestyles. "What's this?" you say. . . "Stalwart James and Tim are making a change?" Yes little virgins, we are. It all started when we watched a little documentary entitled Super-Size Me . If you haven't seen it, you absolutely must. After watching it, and once the nausea of the truth it spoke passed, we made a pact to swear off all the crap American society has deemed as not only acceptable, but expected to pass for daily sustenence; i.e., fast and cheap junk food loaded with cholestoral, salt, refined sugars, processed flours and cheeses, and fats or every kind imaginable. I think the American fast-food industry may have even invented a few new fats in the process of their collective chemically altered food processing to make fast-food faster, cheaper, and tastier (not to mention damn near addictive). I mean, where else but America would plain old sugar just not be sweet eno...

. . . but who's counting, really? I'm back now, and I plan to start updating this here blog thing on a more quasi-regular basis, weather and penguins permitting. "Penguins?" you say, "What Penguins?" The evil penguins of mass disruption, that's what penguins. They throw dead fish of discontent and frustration at you, burying you under a cold, slimy, stinking mass of scales and goo until you can barely breathe. They appear in various forms, but they will always be penguins. Mine came to me last year in the form of unceasing unemployment. They tormented me day in and day out waving my English BA in my face and laughing their evil penguin laugh (which is more of a cross between Danny Devito's "Penguin" laugh in Batman Returns and the obnoxious warble of a Harley Davidson sans muffler) at me as they pointed to my dwindling bank account. Then they would bury me in fish. They got me so deluded into feeling like a big fat failure that they actuall...