Modern Lives

So here I am, the last day at my first job out of college. It's really a shame that I couldn't stay at this job, but too many circumstantial conflicts make it impossible for me to continue on here. It's another one of the cliched moments of bittersweetness. One chapter ends, another opens with hopes upon promises of a brighter future. So here's to Huge Print Press, my (as of 4:00 PM today) former employer who gave me a shot when no one else in 9 months of job-hunting would: Thank you. And here's to [the new company], my (as of 9:00 AM Monday, October 3rd) new employer, who wanted to hire me so badly that they actually went to a lot of trouble: Thank you. Technically, I guess I am officially unemployed again for the next two days, so what better way to celebrate than by pigging out and getting plastered. Cheers-Thanksalot!

OK, I know I complained about the blog videos in the past, but I got curious and clicked over to check out the website that hosts them . . . you know, to see what was there. Well, I came across the new Nine Inch Nails video for the song "Only." After watching it, I decided I had to share it with everyone because it reminded me of a music video from the '80s by Aha (sp.?). You know the one I'm talking about--unless you're too young to have seen it, let alone remember it.--it was "Take on Me." Obviously the music and sentiment share nothing in common, but the style and medium of the video have an interesting parallel. Both depict being trapped in an alternate plain of existence visible to and of physical reality, but seperated and sharply divided from it--the inner fantasy world juxtaposed and competing with reality. Anyway, enjoy! (Video No Longer Available) Cheers-Thanksalot!

(Photo NBC5i.com) Elsie, a St. Bernard puppy from Florida, proved a puppy's stomach can be as big as its eyes when she swallowed a serrated 13-inch knife . O. J. Simpson had no comment except to say, "I was at McDonald's and that puppy's too small for that knife." The knife was successfully removed by a vet and Elsie is now back to salivating over other fine cutlery, though she has been banned from the local House of Blades. Nesbitt , a 13 year old cat and resident of a West Bank home in New Orleans, was found napping peacefully in his usual spot under a chair on his back porch when his people returned home for the first time in the three weeks since Katrina ravaged their city. The eggs in their fridge had exploded, a tree was now part of one wall, facade was missing, an overhang sagged, and a gutter had collapsed, but none of it seemed to bother Nesbitt, whose greeting was a satisfied swish of his bushy tail, as if to say, "Suckers." Michael "Dro...

(photo CBS News/AP/NOAA) As if it weren't enough that Katrina destroyed all those thousands of New Orleanian homes, displacing a quarter-million people, Rita's got to come in and threaten to destroy many of those evacuee's new homes and shelters in Houston. Sheesh, enough with the major hurricanes already. We get it Nature, you are the supreme bitch ruling over all Earth with a might so powerful as to boil the very oceans themselves. Anyway, Houston is another town to which I have ties--I was born there, survived Hurricane Alicia in 1983 there, and lived there for several years as a child. Oh, and I loved its Natural History Musuem. Yes, Houston is not only the origins of me, it's also the origins of my geeky-nerdiness. Maybe that's why I still hold some affection for the dirty, overcrowded, polluted, crime-ridden megaopolis. Houston's a resilient place, so despite Rita's worst, I know it will survive and flourish together with its sister-in-disaster, New O...

Now for the News you've all been waiting for, but probably already know: I HAVE A NEW JOB!!!! That is all . . .

It's not THE big news promised below--I'm still waiting for clearance on that--but it is quite Big and happy. Yesterday, the Massechussetts legisture DEFEATED the state constitutional amendment that would have banned same-sex marriage. Read more about it here . Which brings me to today's THURSDAY SURVEY Targeting Gay - W e d d i n g s! If you had a same-sex wedding, where would you register, Target or Wal-Mart? I know, I know, like I even need to ask. Target, hands down. Cheers-Thanksalot!

Coming soon . . . stay tuned! Unless you've already heard, then it's actually old news to you, so don't spoil it for the other children in comments. Update is imminent. Cheers-Thanksalot!

You know you fucked up when one of your former family-friends starts in on you . Cheers-Thanksalot!

To sleep: perchance to dream: ay, there's the rub; For in that sleep of death, what dreams may come . . . --Prince Hamlet of Denmark, Hamlet by William Shakespeare I think maybe my mind is preoccupied with something lately. I've been having a lot of dreams about death the past few nights. Not violent or murderous dreams; I haven't killed anyone nor has anyone been "killed," per se. No, just dying. They've been emotionally intense dreams to say the least. Maybe it's just my mind's way of trying to deal with my grandmother's sudden death and all the death and destruction inundating us every night on the television since Katrina busted the levees and Potemkin-President Bush murdered all those thousands of people through his wonton and arrogant negligence. Hmm . . . Think I could be feeling some anger, too. Since I wrote Tuesday's post, I have to admit my optimism has jaded a bit. The red sun rising over the horizon of my morning drive now seems ...

Not writing much on this blog started out because I thought I'd run out of things to say. Then Life turned tragic and I didn't have the heart to write. Now, I think I am going to ease back into amusing, confusing, and sometimes infuriating my few readers. There is a wealth of things to bitch about--I suspect such will be the case so long as we have a Bush in the Oval Office--but I'm not going to bitch as much as I have in the past. I'll definitely still point out the sorry shit that goes on in the life politic; however, I realize I border on the whiney petulant pisant rather than the writer full of incredulous indignation. I don't know, maybe I've needed to whine. Offputting as it is to so many others, sometimes pissing and moaning is therapeutic to the Whiner, even if it is like so many Freddy Krueger claws on the blackboard to the Whinees. Don't worry, my little sheoples, I'm still angry and bitter at the world in general and most especially with the i...

Slowly, life goes on. I took down "In Memorium" because the loss is so personal and deep, I felt I had held out there for all to see for long enough. Thank you again for all the kind words, support, and condolences. Also, a BIG THANK YOU to Leeann's mom, Marty, for volunteering to help my family and me settle my grandmother's estate. An even BIGGER THANK YOU to Tim for giving me the love, strength, and fortitude to survive this and to handle what needed, and still needs, to be done. As full of pallid sorrow as I have been, it feels weird to laugh again and to forget, just for a moment, that she's really gone. Each day it grows a little easier, though it still haunts almost every waking minute. Maybe once I settle everything for her, my mind can rest and my heart can heal. I am extending my blogging hiatus for a few more days at least, after which, I plan to dive back in and write until my hands fall from my arms and scamper away. Cheers-Thanksalot.

Lida Marr Barrett Born in San Antonio on September 22, 1920, Lida Marr Boyd moved with her parents and sister to Anson where her father settled a ranch. She married Charles Barrett in 1940 and gave birth to Sassy Barrett on December 30, 1954. She attended college in Abilene and received her teaching certification in 1964. She taught elementary school for 40 years in Abilene, Hurst, and finally in Dallas. She retired at the end of the Spring 2005 term. She passed away in her sleep the morning of Saturday August 20. She was my grandmother. The only one I ever knew. When my mother left my father in 1984, my grandmother, "Dabaw," stepped in and helped my mother and I escape from a dangerous situation. Working not only as a teacher but for 15 years as a customer service rep at Wal-Mart on the weekends, she supported us through my mother's college education and later, supported me through my own. Without her help, love, and support, I would not be where I am today. She ...

Again, I saw this on Megan's Blog and had to try it out. I don't mean to brag, but . . . My IQ Is 140 Logical Intelligence is Genius Verbal Intelligence is Genius Mathematical Intelligence is Genius General Knowledge is Genius A Quick and Dirty IQ Test BTW, go check out Tim's Blog to see Sebastian's dietary progress since last November . . . the difference will blow your fragile little mind. Cheers-Thanksalot!

Ok, so I just saw Megan's post about her ideal car and took the little quiz for myself . . . James's Summer Ride is a Mustang Convertible You're out to experience the very best of summer. From the best beaches to the best tan, you want it all! What's Your Summer Ride? Who'dve guessed?? CHEERS-THANKSAWHOLELOT!

For every time the phone rings when you call after 11:00 PM . . . I SHALL KILL YOU!!! (Seriously, just don't)

I had to share this: How To Tell How Gay Your Gay Son Is I plan to be back on air again soon . . . Patience, my preciouses. Cheers-Thanksalot!

Taking a break from blogging for awhile. Nothing new to say, tired of bitching about the same old shit. Talk amongst yourselves.

A big bloggy welcome to Megan, the latest to succumb to blogging peer pressure and a serious case of Blogis Envy. Heehee, now my commenting minion s , go get her!!! Cheers-Thanksalot!

Underwater, shedding skin swirling thoughts bubble to confusious beats tears and wailing of trouble and troubadours singing blood red fear crusading for lies and truth be told covers my eyes that seeing in front of me for what's in front of me obscurred by fear and pain keeps me alive gives chest-swelling breath strength courage to maintain the struggle for sunlight open air and freedom to live. That hope is dead when Love keeps fighting.

cruel whore of Irony posit your wares of iniquity on the poor and unworthy, Destroyer of dreams feeding with spoons and needles our addiction to hope. You leave us empty, drinking the putrid womb-juice eating the fetid afterbirth of your aborted bastard child, Ennui. Everyday is exactly the same evil enjoys love good suffers indifference once I had a voice now I rarely make a sound Everyday is exactly the same slowly poisoning ourselves longing to forget what we have already forgotten emptiness replaces pain maybe once I had a purpose-- then again, that might have been a dream leaves hope for release will never come.

I wish God were alive to see this. --Homer J. Simpson Homer: Why do you mock me, O Lord? Marge: Homer, that's not God. That's just a waffle that Bart tossed up there. [Marge scrapes it off the ceiling into Homer's hands] Homer: I know I shouldn't eat thee, but -- [bites] Mmm, sacrilicious. -- The Simpsons [. . .] What do you do when your stuck in a chair? Finding it hard to go up and down stairs What do you think of the one you call god? Isn't his absence slightly odd? Maybe he's forgotten you [. . .] --Chumba Wumba Song, Family Guy [. . .] the clouds will part and the sky cracks open and god himself will reach his fucking arm through just to push you down just to hold you down [. . .] [. . .] your god is dead and no one cares [. . .] --"The Wretched" and "Heresy", Nine Inch Nails Feel free to post any of your favorite funny/sacriligious/angry god or jebus quotes in comments. Cheers-Thanks-a lot!

. . . and then you die. If you're as lucky as I am, you find someone special with whom to share in the misery, which makes it at least bearable. Oh you thing called "Life," why do I hate thee at times? James' Life Sucks Top Ten List #10: You suck #9: You have death as a part of you #8: You let Ass-Monkeys get away with bloody murder #7: False hope #6: You give decent people who just want to get through you with as little resistence as possible a nice big Ass-hat to wear, whether we like it or not #5: Your Ass-hats are magnets for Ass-Monkeys and shit #4: Taxes, fees, fines and penalties #3: You're totally unforgiving #2: You conspire with your buddy, Time, to really make things difficult And the Number One reason I hate you at times . . . . You suck! And a note for the Ass-Monkeys of the City of Irving : You suck, I hate you, and I'm glad you're losing the Cowboys! I wish I believed in "God" . . . then I would ...

Time for a tale of terror and creepiness so foul it will leave your soul frozen in trepidation. Turn out the lights, bar the doors, and make sure your windows are locked. For after this tale, you will never feel safe again. Mwaha- Mwhahahahahahahahahahahahaaaaaaa!!!!!! It was Saturday night and Tim and I had just finished enjoying the thrilling scariness of Wes Craven's werewolf movie, Cursed . It was a good movie, witty, smart, and at times, quite frightening. But this, children, is not the center of my terrifying story. Oh no, there's more. Come, lets move to the balcony to discuss it further . . . Tim and I sat on the balcony discussing the movie, I in my usual chair in front of the closet, and Tim in his usual chair next to the pond. The night was quiet, warm, and balmy with the occasional cricket chirp and the steady drone of air conditioning units the only sound, save the occassional car driving by on the nearly abandoned road. As we were debating the finer points of succ...

Timmy J. Studios is pleased to announce the launch of its newest designer label , cats have issues Celebrating the darker side of life with our feline compadres. Surf on over and check it out !

UPDATE: 10:50 AM CDT, Death toll now at 33, not counting the unknown number of people who died in the bus explosion. The Severely injured number has topped 345 and continues to grow. At 9:20 AM London Time, just as the morning commuter rush was entering its peak, four explosions tore through three London Underground stations and one double-decker bus in London's financial district. Reports are still coming in, but so far London authorities have confirmed two dead and estimated as many as 150 seriously wounded. The central London transit system has been completely shut down. Before heading straight back to London from the G8 Summit in Gleneagles, P. M. Tony Blair et al stated the obvious that this was indeed a terrorist attack. Our hearts, empathies, and sympathies go out to everyone affected by this tragedy. This brings the total number of high profile attacks on Western countries to three. September 11, 2001 in New York. March 11, 2004 in Madrid, Spain. July 7, 2005 in London. M...

Hope everyone had a great Fourth of July Weekend, I know I did. Thanks you everyone who came to my birthday swoiree on Friday and thank you for all the thoughtful gifts. I most of all, Thank You, Tim, for masterminding the whole thing. We also had a great time blowing shit up at the Paintiff's Sunday night. Heheheheheheheheheheh FIRE!! Sorry, the Beavis in me gets excited about burning things. Anyway, on to some rather interesting developments that occurred on the Fourth o'July. NASA successfully not the crap out of a comet--literally. The "Deep Impact" project was a complete success and NASA now knows more about what comet nuclei look like and of what materials they consist. It was quite a spectactular event in any case as the picture below indicates: HEEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHHEEHEHEHEHEHEH YEAH, BOOM, YEAH YEAH, BLOW IT UP!!!! Sorry again. See more images here . Another spectacular event that took place on the Fourth besides comet-crashing, was the United Church of Chris...

OK, first I would like to apologize for losing it earlier. I have gotten the funds for gas, the A/C started working a couple of hours ago, it rained, and I am feeling much better now. Thank you to everyone who sent me good mojo and well-wishes. Don't forget, New Yorker Pizza and Pasta tonight at 7 PM for my birthday . If I know you and we're friends, you're invited. But don't come empty handed or I will pretend I don't know you and have Tim remove you from the premises. Forcefully, if necessary. Just Kidding. But seriously, buy me things . I am now signing off for the weekend. Have a great Fourth. Cheers-Thanks-Alot!

Sandra Day O'Conner, moderate Repulican U. S. Supreme Court Justice, announced her retirement today. She was a pivotal swing voter in many cases, especially cases involving civil rights and liberties. You know Bush will put a wingnut theocrat in there. I don't see the weak-kneed democrats stopping him, quite frankly. It's over. Next year there will be no more checks and balances as the Theocrats will control all three branches of the federal government and legislate from their precious fucking fucked-up Xtian Bible. I mourn for America because the America I knew is now officially dead.

Happy fucking birthday to me. We all have bad days, but why does mine have to be on my birthday? Of all the days that could have turned out to be utter crap, why today?? I'll tell you why: the universe has decided that I can't get a goddamn break. Ever. Let me give you a recap of my day thus far, even if it is only two hours old. 6:10 - The cats harass me the second I get out of the shower wanting to be fed. 6:50 - I run REALLY late this morning, but still somehow manage to get out the door only 10 minutes behind schedule. 6:55 - I'm in the car and realize, oh gee, I may not have enough gas to get to work and back, but I'll have to get it on the way home because I don't have time right now. 7:05 - (ten minutes before I'm due at work) I'm almost to Irving and come to the sudden and horrific realization that (A) I don't have enough gas to get home after work without stopping, and (B) joy of fucking joys, I forgot my wallet and I don't hav...

Or at least its on the road . . . Hot off the wires , Spain has just legalized same-sex marriage, adoption, and inheritence rights--nationwide. Holy shit. No wonder traditional WASP Capitalists here are so threatened by Socialists; they actually get things done and the modern Socialists are true equalists (I know that's not a real word, but it works). I think Spain's prime minister said it best: We were not the first, but I am sure we will not be the last. After us will come many other countries, driven, ladies and gentlemen, by two unstoppable forces: freedom and equality. No wonder Bush is nervous about gay equality. It's spreading faster than his so-called brand of freedom, which, let's face it, is merely the freedom to agree with him, his ilk, and their theology. Vaya España!! ¡Salud-Muchas-Gracias!

It's sweltering outside and the world sux. Details to follow . . . Bush gave a speech last night in a feeble attempt to rally public support for his failing presidential policies and desert-Vietnam. He postitulatered mostly on 9/11, evoking its memory at least 5 times throughout his speech, but he forgot to mention how the hunt for Osama bin Forgotten was going. I'm sure he's right on top of that. Or maybe he's a bottom? Certainly would explain Karl Rove's position. Oh, and would sombody please tell Furious George that Iraq had no connection to 9/11? But I digress. Bush also mentioned something about sending more troops if his commanders on the ground say they need them. Whew, getting drafty in here, or is it just me? The military applause ordered by Bush's advance team was an especially nice touch. Can't rely on the military to applaud him voluntarily, now can we. No, mustn't leave the preznit hanging on his punchlines, that would be rude. Anyway, that...

Today marks Tim's and my 7th anniversary. I got to thinking about it yesterday, marveling at that number 7. 7 years. It's hard to believe it's been that long and it's hard to belive it hasn't been longer. I feel like I've known and loved Tim for all my life. Yet, it didn't start until 1998, a rather uneventful summer when Clinton was still president, dot-coms were booming, the towers still stood, and gas was about a buck a gallon. Madonna had released Ray of Light that year, an album which I discovered around the time another ray of light entered my life--Tim. Feel like wretching yet? Wait, there's more. Much like Madonna had done with that album, I too was on a quest to kind of reinvent myself and Tim came along at the perfect time. After a turbulent time in my life, I had moved to a new city, started a new job, started to try and make new friends, and started to live again. It took about two months before I was ready to want to share my life with so...

In honor of the insanity that is the union between Tom Cruise (Psycho cradle-robber much?) and Katie Holmes (Hello? Anybody holme?), Timmy J. Studios has launched a new product line: Katydid Tom Tom ! There you'll find items for all events--indecent proposals in Paris, caped-crusader premieres in New York, and even London reporters who are all wet! Coming soon: Katydid Tom Tom Intersteller Line !! If you can't afford your own planet, wear one! So surf on over and check it out and while you're there, might as well buy something so it's not a wasted trip. Katydid Tom Tom The Webstore

Today's opening day for the long awaited and much anticipated fourth installment in George Romero's infamous zombie serial,with the release of Land of the Dead . The reviews are in and so far, the movie appears to live up to, if not exceed Romero's formidable reputation as a master B-horror-filmmaker. One of the enormous pleasures of genre filmmaking is watching great directors push against form and predictability, as Mr. Romero does brilliantly in "Land of the Dead." One thing is for sure: You won't go home hungry. [. . .] It has extremely intense zombie violence with the usual buckets of blood. -- New York Times The godfather of the modern zombie flick shows us how it's done right: With fleet pacing, well-timed shocks and a stealthy satiric edge. [. . .] the work of a master. -- New York Newsday Zombies of the world unite! [. . .] You have nothing to lose but your . . . toes, spines, and heads. -- Toledo Blade Mr. Romero [. . . is]...

. . . until my birthday , so if you haven't already, better get to shopping !! It's Friday, July 1st , with dinner at New Yorker and everyone's invited! (Unless you're on my Sh!t L!st, then it's best if you stay in another zip code) Please buy me things . . .

UPDATE: As I published this post, I discovered that the White House issued a statement concerning Rove and the Democratic outcry for an apology or resignation, and a repudiation from Bush. Officially, the White House stands by Rove's remarks. All right. It's on now. No more Mr. Nice Liberal. Impeach this ass-monkey. And if you voted for this Ass-hat idiot son of an asshole twice, I've got a can of rhetorical whoop-ass with your name written all over it. The man must go. Last night in New York, Rove said at a news conference that liberals "don't get 9-11" and don't see the attacks as "savage": Liberals saw the savagery of the 9/11 attacks and wanted to prepare indictments and offer therapy and understanding for our attackers," Rove said. "Conservatives saw the savagery of 9/11 and the attacks and prepared for war.... Conservatives saw what happened to us on 9/11 and said we will defeat our enemies. Liberals saw what happened to us and...

You've made my Shit List. Per their win-a-wedding contest rules: PLEASE NOTE: This opportunity is open only to currently engaged couples consisting of a male and a female , who are legal residents of the United States currently residing in the continental United States, each of whom is at least 21 years of age as of June 13, 2005 and each of whom complies with the additional requirements set forth in these Rules. Like Aravosis said over at AMERICAblog , kinda makes you wonder about Kojo's termination. So screw you Matt and Katie. I never liked Katie's hair and speaking of . . . Matt, YOU'RE BALD! Give it up already. And Al . . . you're still fat . Bitches and Assholes.

Since I seemed to have ruffled someone's feathers enough by calling the Senator from Texas a bitch for not cosponsering an anti-lynching bill (which she later did retroactively, thus I removed the qualifier "supreme" from my insult), I thought I would make a list of all the assholes who've pissed me off, both politically and personally, some if not most of whom I will "disparage" at will. Just exercising my right to freedom of speech by voicing my opinion. I will not slander or libel anyone by making false accusations, but I will call people naughty names and rant and rave about things they've done or said, or things they should have done or said yet stayed mute. I am not politically correct, I do not kowtow to "Dear Leader" and his party of right-wing, affluent hooligans just because he happen to be president and let planes crash into buildings on his watch. I will criticize and insult him, anyone in his party, and anyone outside his party who...

Hutchison has finally done the honorable thing and signed on as a cosponser to the anti-lynching bill. Let's see what Cornyn does. I take back what I said about Senator Hutchison, she is not a supreme bitch . . . . . . just a regular one.

To the Peter-copter! We must beat the giant chicken and evade the evil monkey that lives in my closet and get the new UNRATED Family Guy Movie, coming out in September, direct to DVD. The 83 minute movie is entitled "Family Guy Presents Stewie Griffin: The Untold Story" and promises to be freakin' SWEET! Now, save your pennies before the people stealing Mayor West's water get them, cuz the DVD ain't free ($29.99) and you can't scare the retailer out of it by dressing like Meg (Griffin, not Davidson) or getting drunk on martini's and humping his leg. Giggidy-giggidy!!!

You know you're in trouble when FP Clinton gets on to you .

My first open thread (where people are free to leave comments about whatever they like) in honor of Tim being home--welcome back, love! Chat away.

Since Tim is out of town this week, I thought I would make my own contribution to the news update. I only hope I can come within the same galaxy of evil funny that Tim created. So, without further ado, let's start with the afternoon of cliches . . . Every now and then you come across living examples of why cliches and stereotypes exist, well yesterday I experienced two and heard about one. While shopping at my local Tom Thumb, I saw a woman running across the store holding two melons (I think they were cantaloupes) in front of her chest. (See, George, this is what I would look like if I were Dolly Parton. Can I have that boob job now?") Then, at the gas station, there was a man ahead of me in line that was, I kid you not, at least seven feet tall. He paid for his gas and cell phone minutes and walked back out to his car. When I went back to my car, I realized he drove an eighties model Geo Metro two door hatchback--a.k.a., the smallest car ever sold in America. It brought to m...

Tim's flight went smoothly and he is now in Arkansas. My day feels hollow without being able to IM him. Still no word on exactly when he'll be back--either Friday night or Saturday morning/afternoon. Oh, and add that supreme bitch, Sen. Kay Bailey Hutchison (R-TX) to the list of modern-era senators refusing to cosponser the anti-lynching measure. I have also added her to my litany of reasons for truly despising this fucktard state in which I live. MEMO TO THE GOP: Your true (lack of) colors are showing. Smarmy sanctimonious bastards.

Two things: Tim's Leaving For Arkansas for 3 or 4 days I HATE TEXAS--yes, it's official now Item the first, Tim is leaving for AR, again. I understand why he's going, and I'm not upset about that. I just hate having him gone. I can't sleep, I pace the apartment, I develop a bad case of OCD, even the cats go a little crazy. We all go a little crazy. I will miss him madly. As for Texas, wouldn't you know, with all the vitriol that has shamed this state for so many years now, Senator Cornyn has shamed us further by refusing to sign on to the anti-lynching bill currently in the U. S. Senate. Maybe he's afraid some activist judge would use it as an excuse to legislate from the bench and outlaw lynching the fags, too. I hate Texas. I hate being without Tim. It is going to be a challenging few days ahead.

In case you haven't heard, Michael Jackson has been on trial for--shock of shocks--inappropriate behavior toward young boys. And if you haven't heard, you might want to come out from under that rock every now and then, you know, just to check in with the world, but at least your rock has internet access. Anyway, I digress . . . Your favorite insult comic dog and mine, Triumph, hit the streets to harass a no more deserving group of people than the Michael Jackson fans stationed outside the courthouse in California, where the trial has been ongoing. It is quite amusing . . . FOR ME TO POOP ON! Oh-yes, OH-YES! Go over and check it out, bitches. I keed, I keed!

How's this for the ultimate in commitment symbolism: artistic designers and bioengineers in England are developing a technique for growing bones from harvested osteoblasts (bone cells that grow new bone, commonly found in the jaw bone) and growing them in any form they want, including jewelry--starting with commitment bands. They will make the commitment or wedding rings for 180 volunteer couples selected for the research project, who will have their wisdom teeth removed and the osteoblasts that are then accessible harvested and sprinkled over a porous, ceramic-like substance to which the cells will attach themselves and eventually grow to replace. The bone discs are then carved into rings and attached to an inner band of precious metal. Locker-room jokesters everywhere are saddened as the colloquialism "to bone him/her" will now have another, more engaging meaning. However, body piercers are excited about having yet one more way in which to express their desire to stick ...

Still think the comparison between the progression of anti-Judaism in Nazi Germany and the spread of legislative and theocratic gay-bashing in "modern" America is suspect? Then read this and decide for yourself. Read it all the way to the bottom--the last comparison is truly chilling.

That's right, on June 24th, George A. Romero releases the fourth installment of his Living Dead series. Now, I've been a zombie movie fan since I was a kid, and let me tell you, I am super psyched about this. Romero for years has teased fans with wanting to produce a follow-up to his previous threezombie films, Night of the Living Dead , Dawn of the Dead , and Day of the Dead . I am looking forward to this more than I did the long anticipated return of the Star Wars genre with its Epsodes 1, 2, & 3. I think zombie movies speak more to the dark side of the post-modern social climate and human nature itself--especially in Romero's films--than do Star Wars and its ilk. I find these movies infinitely more fascinating in that respect. The only exception being Roddenberry's work, as he took a more balanced look at humanity's optimistic potential and abysmal failures. Star Wars tries too hard to be mythical in how it presents its story. The Star Trek genre is more rela...

. . . when stowing away aboard an airplane, do not stowaway in the landing gear. Or so a man found out the hard way when he did just that on a South African Airways flight from Dakar to New York. No one had any idea the man was (kind of) onboard until ground crews found the parts of him that hadn't fallen from the wheel well into a New York woman's backyard. Long Island resident Pam Hearne was startled when she heard a loud bang come from outside and totally grossed out when she realized it was the sound of a shoed leg still attached to a partial torso hitting her garage roof and bouncing into her yard. Apparently, the man's body was drawn and quartered when the landing gear deployed as the flight made its final approach toward a New York airport. Ouch. Luckily, the plane only suffered minor damage and slight staining to its wheel. No word yet on who the genius was that put himself through the equivalent of a human meat grinder.

I was over reading Lesley's blog about the social tragedy yesterday at the Fort Worthless X-tian academy and something she said stuck out: [. . .] they just hate me for loving Bekka. They don't know us, but they smile so big and proud because we (still) can't get married. It's all very heartwarming isn't it?? But don't you dare get all thoughtful and compare it to the plight of the black man back in the day...Pastor Dwight McKissick of Cornerstone Baptist Church in Arlington will put a real quick stop to that...he says not to 'compare your sin with our skin'. HOW SILLY OF ME TO COMPARE!! He was already black that day I DECIDED to fall in love with girls so everyone would hate me! Damn me to hell! I have a theory about the black ministers who are touting sentiments similar to the phrase "[don't] compare your sin with our skin". It's the usual fear that stems from ignorance mixed with jealousy. I know what you're thinking. You...